weird signs
I spent some time with my brother in NYC. He has a new pad in the meatpacking district. I spotted this sign in the alley that leads up to his building. It says “No Playing Soccer, Scatting, Biking”. These three things have absolutely nothing in common, which made me wonder how this sign ever came to be.
The alley is extremely small, so I can’t imagine that a game of soccer ever took place there. But apparently at some point in time this alley was dominated by soccer players. They must have been little people. I think it made the locals uncomfortable, navigating through an army of athletic little people to get home. So my theory is that they put up a sign saying “no playing soccer” because you don’t want to put up a sign saying “no athletic little people”. This cleared up the alley to be taken over by bikers, which is much more scary than athletic little people. So they added “no biking”. Everything must have been rosy until the alley was beset with zoot suit wearing folks going “scooby beet dat doo dat dee”. The residents probably found this more annoying than scary, so they added “no scatting” to the sign and the zoot suiters went away.
That’s my theory, anyway.
